I’m the one who steals your socks
and messes up your bed.
When you wash your white laundry
I add in something red!
I like to throw around kids toys,
and put crumbs in the rug,
and when I’m feeling up to it
I leave that film inside your tub.
I like to make large balls of hair
and stick them in your drain,
and leave the dishes on the floor
so they will spill, and leave a stain!
Wonder where the weeds come from?
I plant them every night.
The ants? The bugs? And all those mice?
To one like me,
they are quite nice.
So enjoy these things from me to you,
they’re gifts, in perfect style,
And every time you feel annoyed,
You’ll think of me and smile.